When Your Feelings Flash Like a Dashboard Light

Understanding Your Inner Emotional Compass

I still remember the first time the oil light flashed during a late-night drive from a workshop, tired and distracted. My pulse quickened immediately as I stared at the dashboard, wondering what had gone wrong this time, slightly panicked. I became frustrated and focused on the bulb, as if it had personally interrupted my good playlist and ruined the evening. Then reason finally kicked in, and I realised the bulb was only signalling a real issue in the engine, not the problem itself. Over time, I’ve come to see how our emotions behave like that—warning lights needing thoughtful attention and care.

Feelings spark, pulse, or throb to alert us that something deeper within truly deserves a closer, honest look. Psychologists Norbert Schwarz and Gerald Clore showed that our mood directly shapes how we perceive life, affecting judgment and decisions. When we feel anxious, angry, or low, it doesn’t mean something is broken—it simply means something matters deeply. Emotions are not annoying glitches to ignore but useful data points that invite reflection, direction, and inner alignment. Every feeling you experience highlights a current need, personal value, or an important boundary that calls for attention.

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) begins by asking, “What job is this emotion trying to do?” Marsha Linehan identifies three important roles that emotions consistently play in our lives. First, our emotions send signals and messages to other people in meaningful ways. Second, emotions prime our bodies for quick and often necessary physical or verbal action. Third, they help validate and confirm our personal experience, giving context to what we’re feeling. Anger might show a boundary was crossed, while sadness slows us to process and seek needed support.

Extensive reviews of Dialectical Behaviour Therapy show that understanding emotions this way reduces distress, impulsivity, and self-harm across a wide range of psychological conditions. The effectiveness of DBT lies not in eliminating emotions entirely but in reshaping how individuals interpret and respond to them in the context of their lives and relationships. Rather than suppressing feelings, the therapy helps people decode emotional signals, identify underlying needs, and choose more deliberate, values-aligned actions that support personal growth and resilience.

Start by identifying what’s happening in your body and giving the feeling a clear name. You might notice a tight chest or racing heart and label it anxiety. Labelling the emotion reduces its intensity and gives you a sense of control over the moment. It’s like spotting the oil light on the dashboard and knowing it needs attention. When we name the emotion, we separate ourselves slightly from it and create space to respond. This step invites awareness and breaks the cycle of reacting automatically out of habit. Recognising the signal helps you choose your next move with more intention.

A client, whom I will call Aaron*, came to therapy furious at his colleague and ready to explode. At first, he described only the intense heat in his shoulders, the buzzing in his mind, and the urge to quit on the spot. When we slowed the moment down together, he realised the anger pointed to a more profound fear of being sidelined in the project he deeply loved. Once the message became clear, he scheduled a calm meeting, outlined his unique contributions, and asked for specific role definitions moving forward. That difficult feeling had done its job effectively, providing direction and motivation rather than destruction. Smashing the emotional bulb in frustration would never have fixed the engine underneath or preserved the relationship. Instead, by noticing the signal and responding intentionally, Aaron took back control without betraying himself.

Next time your own “dashboard” lights up, take a brief pause first. Then notice the dry mouth before a meeting and stay present. Next, feel the sting of envy when a friend succeeds and reflect inward. After that, ask yourself what value is blinking beneath this emotional reaction. Furthermore, consider which personal boundary feels crossed or fragile at the moment. Also, ask what specific need is calling out for attention or care. Then choose curiosity over contempt and soften your internal dialogue. As a result, emotional signals will feel more like guidance than threats. In time, you will recognise emotions as tools for clarity and direction. Eventually, the road ahead becomes clearer and far easier to navigate.

Keeping Your Inner Emotional Compass Aligned