Rumours, Noise and Real Growth: Learning to Keep My Eyes on the Road
Matthew is a closeted gay.” “Matthew jumps from woman to woman.” “He’s money-minded.” “I’ve heard he sees women for free if they ‘offer favours’.” . “I’ve heard he’s manipulative.” “He chose sex therapy because he must be a pervert.” “All talk, no sex.” “Matthew abuses his psychology assistants—slave-driver, really.” “He’s definitely a narcissist on TV all the time.”. This is simply an account of the rumours spread about me over the years. Some is unintentionally funny, most is hurtful, and none is true. But for a long period, I responded to every whisper as an emergency. I wrote clarifications
Lessons Learned from Being Malta’s First Sex Therapist
When I first entered the world of sex therapy, I wasn’t merely starting a clinic, I was coming into the midst of issues around sex in Malta. I was starting a conversation that others simply didn’t want to have, confronting silence with honesty and discomfort with truth. So I knew that it wouldn’t be easy. Resistance was expected. What I didn’t expect was the level of pushback, not just from the public but also from institutions, educators and my professional circles. Some experience has been beautiful, some painful, and others priceless, but not all lessons are easy. Not a
How I Work Hard and Live Well: Staying Productive Without Burning Out
People ask me all the time how do I stay motivated and prevent burnout from working long hours and having multiple projects coming together for a period. And I have devised this system over the years that works for me and allows me to lead productive and successful lives at the same time. Here’s an inside look at how I solve the problem when it seems too easy. I realise most people think 4:30 am is absurdly early, but it’s been life-changing for me. I used to get rushed when I woke up, behind on emails, and as though
Ikigai vs. Workaholism: Why I’ve Given Up Perfectionism and Workaholic Tendencies
1) Confronting Challenges. Throughout my career, I've always faced problems head-on. Being straightforward in tough situations is part of who I am. While I was committed to my work, I sometimes let it turn into workaholism. It's not that I avoided personal issues or difficult relationships; it was all my own doing. But at that time, as he describes them, I dealt with those issues immediately. 2) Sustainable Pace: Perfectionism Becomes a Shield. My workaholic tendencies were more about external obstacles: authorities who seemed intent on obstructing me; colleagues who, perhaps out of envy, spread misinformation or tried to
How to Avoid Burnout in Leadership Roles: Unfiltered Tips
Burnout in a leader can strike just at the worst of times, and with no warning or warning signs at all. The great thing is that as a leader, you'll constantly pull yourself and your team behind all the tasks and decisions from all angles while playing the spotlight. However, the hard reality is that your company will die soon enough along with you in the event of neglected health. Without proper treatment, workers who are suffering from burnout will find no way to lead or even grow. Burnout has a waiting time to settle in; the time isn’t
Understanding various personality types will help you lead when “surrounded by idiots”
When you are a leader, you have experienced the feeling of being in a room full of foolheads. Managers and employers usually respond with dissatisfaction but the reality is different. Accepting and integrating in a complex team, and the different personalities of team members are what help leaders to be effective in difficult times. This blog explores the four personality types articulated by Thomas Erikson in his book *Surrounded by Idiots: Red, Yellow, Green, and Blue*, along with practical tactics for leading each of them. It relies on the concepts in the book to do so. Four personality types
Narcissism in Management
The phenomenon of narcissism in management is many-layered and complex, dealing with issues in teams and decision-making. While it is often associated with negative traits such as arrogance and manipulativeness, it is also the driver of strong thought. Certain narcissistic traits contribute to organizational success, sometimes positively; others are counterproductive; yet one of their main functions is instilling confidence in leadership positions. If we look at some of the three dominant types of narcissism and their concomitant behaviors, we can see that they greatly impact the organizational growth of an organization. Narcissistic leaders take decisive action and pursue significant
Loneliness in Management: Overcoming and Comprehending the Silent Struggle
In the modern-day commercial world, management positions often herald professional fulfillment, an increased sense of accountability and the prospect of social influence. But in truth, it is a common and unspoken challenge that many managers must keep under the radar — loneliness. Underneath the veneer of authority and success, this psychological toll frequently hides in plain sight. This blog addresses loneliness in leadership positions in particular, its negative effect on mental and job performance wellbeing, and practical methods to tackle this frequently under-discussed topic. While loneliness may strike anyone, managers face unique challenges that magnify the loneliness they experience.
Manager’s Morning Brew
Start your week with a breakfast meeting that is both purposeful and energising for HR professionals and supervisors. These events will provide a platform for discussion on issues critical for the success and leadership of an organisation. Below are ten themes to structure the discussions: 1. Developing Anti-Fragility and Resilience Investigate methods for cultivating an anti-fragile mindset and enhancing team resilience to enable the organisation to flourish in the face of adversity. 2. Leadership and Emotional Intelligence Examine the significance of emotional intelligence in the management of organisations, improving communication, and enhancing leadership effectiveness. 3. Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion
The Path to Genuine Resilience: Adopting Antifragility
My life and those around me have informed me that, in an ever-changing and ever-reactive world, being resilient is no longer enough. The old resilience, returning to the previous state after failing, has failed to meet today’s complex and unpredictable realities. A new responsibility for individuals is to actively cultivate an ability to go through struggle, rather than bounce back. But instead of adhering to a traditional version of stability, they must embrace adaptability and transformation as inherent components of survival. We need to try, instead, to reach antifragility, a term introduced by Nassim Nicholas Taleb in his book
