Escaping the Perfection Trap: How Letting Go Boosted My Success and Happiness
Escaping the Perfection Trap: How Letting Go Boosted My Success and Happiness For years, I held myself to impossibly high standards, demanding perfection from every task, relationship, and project. I had this unrelenting drive to result in success. Instead, it resulted in exhaustion, irritation, and unhappiness. As I got more focused on achieving flawless results, I realised that perfectionism was not an asset but an addictive loop that sapped my energy and that of others. My turning point came when I read Marion Woodman's Addiction to Perfection. Woodman's work provides important insights into the dark side of perfectionism, examining
Ending the Trap: How Putting Myself First Increased My Performance at Work
For a long time, I had the misconception that working nonstop was the key to success. I sacrificed my relationships, mental health, and equilibrium in the process of pushing myself to my limits in pursuit of my professional aspirations. While I accomplished a lot, I should have paid more attention to the people and experiences that really mattered because I was too preoccupied with getting things done. I learned with time that success at the expense of one's health couldn’t be maintained. My mornings look drastically different now. At five in the morning, I make it a point to
I Was Over-Critical of Myself
I brutally punished myself for a significant portion of my life. No matter how hard I tried, my inner critic would always find something new to point out about how inadequate I was. This extremely critical voice impacted my entire life, affecting my sense of self-worth and self-esteem, as well as my ability to accomplish any goal I set. I felt trapped in an endless loop of negativity due to the severe self-criticism I had developed. As a child, I had high expectations for myself, believing that nothing less than perfection would suffice. My brain and grades gave me
Blinded by Expectations: My Failure to Appreciate My Parents
For many years, I fiercely condemned my parents and emphasised their imperfections. I concentrated on what they didn't know. I focused on what they should have done. I was so focused on the harm created by their omissions. I was disappointed. I wanted better. I expected better. When I went to friends' houses, I compared how other parents were. I compared various aspects of others with features I did not enjoy in my parents. Growing up, I sometimes underestimated the importance of the teachings and values that my parents instilled in me. As a young adult, I found their
Learning the Hard Way: Failures in my own personal sexuality and relationships
As a sex and relationship therapist, you may think I've always succeeded in my personal relationships. However, my trip has been far from ideal. I've had several relationship disasters, accepting behaviour that I should never have endured and behaving in ways that I'm embarrassed to recollect. These encounters have been both humbling and enlightening, teaching me significant lessons about relationships and sexuality. In multiple relationships, I found myself tolerating behaviour that was damaging and totally contrary to my own principles. I might save my partner by tolerating these acts or repairing our relationship. This false feeling of obligation caused
Rushed Decisions: The Downfall of Ignoring My Gut in Entrepreneurship
As an entrepreneur, I’ve had countless failures, many resulting from not following my instincts and making rushed judgements. These encounters have been some of my professional career’s most challenging yet transformational times. Ignoring my gut feelings One of my most critical mistakes was not believing my gut instincts. Throughout my entrepreneurial career, my intuition alerted me to possible hazards. However, motivated by ambition and a desire for immediate achievement, I frequently ignored these internal cautions. I vividly recall times when my gut instinct warned caution, but I opted to persist, sure that my aims would outweigh any hazards. Hasty